How to Overcome Fear and Talk About Our Faith

I was on a bus taking a church or school trip…I think. The memory is hazy around the edges, but its core is seared into my mind. I don’t remember who I was with, where we were going, or why we were going there, but I do remember the guy sitting next to me. He was a complete stranger to me. We didn’t talk.

Why is this memory imprinted onto my guilty conscience? Because I felt the Holy Spirit prompt me to tell him about the love of Jesus…and I stayed silent. I felt the urge to strike up a spiritual conversation and see what God had planned, but I chickened out.  I sat there next to him for a long time and never said a word. 

Have you ever had a moment like that? Where you knew what you ought to do but didn’t do it? You knew you were supposed to say something, but you stayed silent? I know God loves me and offers forgiveness for all our sins and shortcomings, but this failure has stuck around in the back corners of my mind for years.

Why? I don’t know. What was God up to? What was this guy on the bus going through? How might I have helped him? These questions will go unanswered because I failed to speak. 

• What would I have said to him?
• How could I bring up spiritual things without sounding like a goon?
• What if he rejected my attempt at conversation?
• What if he asked me a question I couldn’t answer?
• How could someone like me make a difference in the life of a complete stranger during a random encounter on a bus trip?

These were some of the thoughts that went through my mind as I sat on that bus. They’re the same questions I’ve had countless times when I’ve had the opportunity to talk to someone about God, faith, or Christianity. I did not feel equipped or confident enough to step up to the plate and engage with someone about their spiritual life. I didn’t have any tools in my tool belt. Maybe you can relate.

1 Peter 3:15 says to "...always be prepared to give a defense/answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have…"

Jude 1:3 says to "contend for the faith…"

2 Corinthians 10:5 says, "we demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ."

In Matthew 28:19-20, Jesus says, "Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you."

What Are We Called To?

Scripture seemed clear that Christians are to be a speaking, teaching, preaching, and discipling people. I’ve had doubts and questions in my faith walk, and I’ve found many answers through Bible study and Christian Apologetics.

Despite knowing more about my faith, I was still helpless in defending it adequately or sharing it with others. I still didn’t have a clue when it came to the art of spiritual conversations with those who didn’t hold my views. That’s when I first encountered a book written by Gregory Koukl called Tactics: A Game Plan for Discussing Your Christian Convictions.

Not only did this book offer the answers I needed on how to engage with non-believers, but it also gave me the assurance to step confidently into any conversation with any person I came upon, regardless of the other person’s background or education. In short, this book changed my life by getting me off the bench and into the game of Christian evangelism and discipleship. 

There are so many great nuggets in this book; so many special "tactics" one can employ in conversation to stay in the driver’s seat of the conversation and to remain in a position of safety so you can confidently talk to anyone.

The most paradigm-shifting characteristic about this wonderful book, however, is the tone and focus taught. So often, when we think about evangelism or talking about religion, what comes to mind is combat. It’s WWIII around the Thanksgiving dinner table and Uncle Roger is about to blow an artery! 

Instead of a combative or confrontational style, Koukl encourages a relaxed, conversational approach in which the Christian can use questions to draw out the other person, find common ground, and discover flaws in thinking. These questions can be gently used to "leave a stone in their shoe" so that even after the conversation ends, the other person is stuck mulling over something you said that got them thinking. 

What is the Goal?

Another incredibly helpful part of the "tactical" approach is the goal of any given conversation. So often, we think we have to get that hostile atheist all the way to the foot of the cross, or we've somehow failed. The words of Jesus paint a different picture. In John 4:37-38, Jesus says to his disciples regarding the spiritual harvest:

Thus the saying "One sows and another reaps" is true. I sent you to reap what you have not worked for. Others have done the hard work, and you have reaped the benefits of their labor.

Jesus indicates that not all the work of making a disciple rests on a single person. Some people are gardeners. They water the plants, they pull out weeds, they fertilize, they prune, and they prepare. Others are harvesters. These are the people who come upon a field of ripe fruit, apply delicate pressure, and the fruit falls into the basket. Not every conversation we have with unbelievers has to get to a profession of faith. Sometimes the best we can do is pull a weed or sprinkle a little water onto thirsty soil.

Since I first read Tactics, my confidence in talking with non-believers and my ability to navigate conversations safely and effectively have blossomed. I still have a lot to learn, but this book has equipped me with tools I didn’t have on that bus all those years ago. I sometimes wonder: if I could go back and redo that moment when God was asking me to simply start a conversation, would I obey? I want to say that I would!

When I think back, I had a lot of fear and insecurity about my faith. While I certainly have such a long way to go in my sanctification journey, I think I can honestly say that I don’t have a lot of that old fear and insecurity anymore. One of the key things that’s made the difference for me was reading this book.

We Can Be Confident!

When I look around at the Church in America today, I see a lot of timidity and insecurity. I know what that’s like because I felt that way for years. I’ve come to believe, through the clear teaching of the Word of God, that Jesus calls us to be bold, confident, and ready!

So many people feel like they’re sitting on the sidelines because they don’t have the tools to get off the bench and into the game. They don’t know what to say, when or how to say it, or how to respond to objections. But the Body of Christ needs every member in action. I honestly believe that with a book like Tactics, some practice, a lot of prayer, and the power of the Holy Spirit, the Church today can change the world for the Kingdom.

Jesus said, "The harvest is plentiful, but the workers are few." My encouragement to you is to equip yourselves with the tools to engage in productive spiritual conversations and get in the game! Answer the call! It’s not as scary as it seems, and God might just use you to change someone’s life!