How Does Wealth Impact Your Relationships? (Proverbs 19)
How do you build friendships with both the wealthy and the poor? Proverbs reminds us that love and humility are better foundations than wealth or status.
Proverbs 19
Today's Scripture Passage
A Few Thoughts to Consider
How do you build friendships with people who have money and those who do not?
It’s worth noting that many people in developed countries know very little of true poverty. For example, one of the most common yet staggering statistics is that if you make more than $34,000 US dollars a year, you make more than 99% of people on the globe.[1] However, Proverbs 19 teaches us that riches and poverty are more than just how much money is in one’s bank account. They are dividing lines that separate those who have access and those who do not. Consider a few of these verses:
1 Better a poor person who lives with integrity
than someone who has deceitful lips and is a fool.
4 Wealth attracts many friends,
but a poor person is separated from his friend.
6 Many seek a ruler’s favor,
and everyone is a friend of one who gives gifts.
7 All the brothers of a poor person hate him;
how much more do his friends
keep their distance from him!
He may pursue them with words,
but they are not there.
10 Luxury is not appropriate for a fool—
how much less for a slave to rule over princes!
17 Kindness to the poor is a loan to the Lord,
and he will give a reward to the lender.
There are several things we learn from these verses. First, it’s better to be poor and do what is right than to be rich and do what is wrong. Always. Second, being wealthy increases your influence. Everyone wants to be around someone who might share their wealth. Third, there is a sort of burden that poor people, particularly those who are lazy, put on their friends. Fourth, sometimes poor people simply do not know how to handle wealth if they obtain it. Fifth, an act of kindness to the poor is an act of kindness to God.
Historically, those who are poor have little sway in society and serve at the privilege of those who are rich. As Duane Garrett writes, “Since a poor person is not in a position to demand fair treatment, he or she seldom gets it.”[2] Garrett goes on to write:
So far, the description of the one with wealth and friends is neutral, yet reader’s sympathies are directed to the isolated poor; the plenty of the rich seems merely unfair, not culpable. Yet the proverb points out the painful truth that most would rather be a friend to the rich. More than anything else, the proverb is an indictment of unreliable friends.[3]
This brings us to the heart of the matter. It’s true that wealth or poverty impacts friendships. That said, we should do all we can to build friendships with those who have means and those who do not. If we don’t, our view of life will become skewed. If we only associate with those who have wealth, we might increase our personal net worth at the expense of our empathy. If we only associate with those who are poorer than us, we might embrace an impoverished mindset.
