Why Doesn’t God Use Me Like He Uses Others? (Numbers 10:10-12)
Have you ever felt jealous of how God seems to use others more than you? This frustration is nothing new, but there is something you can do.
Numbers 10:10-12
Today's Scripture Passage
A Few Thoughts to Consider
Have you ever felt jealous over how God seems to use others more than you?
This frustration is nothing new. In Numbers 11, the people are back to their grumbling ways. They are tired of God's manna and say in verse 5, “We remember the free fish we ate in Egypt, along with the cucumbers, melons, leeks, onions, and garlic.” It gets so bad that families are openly “weeping at the entrance of their tents.”[1]
Hearing this, God is angry, and Moses is provoked. In a raw exchange, Moses says to God, 11 “Why have you brought such trouble on your servant? Why are you angry with me, and why do you burden me with all these people? 12 Did I conceive all these people? Did I give them birth so you should tell me, ‘Carry them at your breast, as a nursing mother carries a baby,’ to the land that you swore to give their ancestors?”
Despite his anger, God miraculously provides the people with more quail than they can eat, even as they continue to complain. While it was one thing for the people to grumble against God and Moses, the grumbling hits home in Numbers 12 when Miriam and Aaron, Moses’ siblings, also turn on him. Verses 1-2 tell us, 1 “Miriam and Aaron criticized Moses because of the Cushite woman he married (for he had married a Cushite woman). 2 They said, ‘Does the Lord speak only through Moses? Does he not also speak through us?.’”
We can’t be sure if this “Cushite woman” is a reference to Moses’ wife, Zipporah. If so, it’s possible Miriam and Aaron are making an ethnic slur “by likening Zipporah’s darker skin to that of an African.”[2] But “most commentators think [this woman] may have been Moses’ second wife and that she had come from Ethiopia (e.g., Gen. 10:6).”[3] Nevertheless, as Gordon Wenham writes, “The text does not explain why Miriam and Aaron objected to this woman, because in reality their objections to her were only a smokescreen for their challenge to Moses’ spiritual authority.”[4]
However, they’ve attacked the wrong man. Verse 3 makes this simple yet profound statement: 3 “Moses was a very humble man, more so than anyone on the face of the earth.” And in verses 4-8, God issues Miriam and Aaron a stunning rebuke.
4 Suddenly the Lord said to Moses, Aaron, and Miriam, “You three come out to the tent of meeting.” So the three of them went out. 5 Then the Lord descended in a pillar of cloud, stood at the entrance to the tent, and summoned Aaron and Miriam. When the two of them came forward, 6 he said:
“Listen to what I say:
If there is a prophet among you from the Lord,
I make myself known to him in a vision;
I speak with him in a dream.
7 Not so with my servant Moses;
he is faithful in all my household.
8 I speak with him directly,
openly, and not in riddles;
he sees the form of the Lord.
So why were you not afraid to speak against my servant Moses?”
In only a few words, God not only sticks up for Moses, but he also puts Miriam and Aaron in their proper place. They do not have the type of relationship with God that Moses had. And one of the reasons for this was Moses’ trust in who God was. Because of their rebellion, Miriam becomes a leper and “is the first biblical case of scaly skin disease (ṣaraꜥat) as a devastating, socially stigmatizing divine punishment by which outer decay reflects inner moral ‘leprosy.’”[5]
By giving her a disease that eats away at her physical body, God is giving Miriam and others an internal look at the state of her soul. Only Moses’ intercession to God spares her life.
This passage teaches us several invaluable lessons. First, God values a humble heart. Second, the essence of humility is unwavering trust. Third, God sticks up for those who fear him. Fourth, God uses many ways to reveal the true state of our hearts. And fifth, God can work through whoever he wishes, whenever he wishes.
This last point is especially important. Many people’s natural default understanding of God is a meritocracy. If they do and say the right things, then he will use them as they wish. But that is not how God operates. God’s part is to provide instruction; our part is to trust and obey.
A Meditation to PRAY
Praise | Thank you, Lord, that you stick up for those who are humble and trust you. You are my defender and the only one I long to please.
Release | I give you my feelings of jealousy and bitterness today.
Ask | Bless those in my life who seem to be experiencing your blessing more than me.
Yield | Help me live with a heart of gratitude today.
A Challenge to Act Like Christ
Sometimes, it's tough to accept how God seems to bless some and not others. But in Romans 9:14-16, Paul has some great words of advice when he writes, 14 “What should we say then? Is there injustice with God? Absolutely not! 15 For he tells Moses, I will show mercy to whom I will show mercy, and I will have compassion on whom I will have compassion. 16 So then, it does not depend on human will or effort but on God who shows mercy.”
If you’ve obeyed God’s voice but don’t feel like you see any fruits for your labors, take heart and don’t give into grumbling or bitterness. Praise God for the ways he is blessing others, and resist bitterness by being proactive. If you’re single and wish you could be married, thank God for your friend who just tied the knot. If you’re married and wish you could have kids, volunteer to babysit your friends’ children. And if you’re in pastoral ministry, but your church is smaller than you’d like, thank God for the church up the street experiencing growth.
Bitterness is like a leprous disease that destroys our souls; gratefulness is the only antidote.
[1] Numbers 11:10
[2]Roy Gane, Leviticus, Numbers, The NIV Application Commentary. Accordance electronic ed. (Grand Rapids: Zondervan, 2004), 590.
[3]Gordon J. Wenham, Numbers: An Introduction and Commentary, vol. 4 of Tyndale Old Testament Commentaries. IVP/Accordance electronic ed. (Downers Grove: InterVarsity Press, 1981), 125.
[4]Gordon J. Wenham, Numbers: An Introduction and Commentary, vol. 4 of Tyndale Old Testament Commentaries. IVP/Accordance electronic ed. (Downers Grove: InterVarsity Press, 1981), 125.
[5]Roy Gane, Leviticus, Numbers, The NIV Application Commentary. Accordance electronic ed. (Grand Rapids: Zondervan, 2004), 593.
