Forgive Now, Don't Wait

One of the clearest examples of forgiveness I have ever witnessed is in the life of a young man from our church named Eduardo. Although he is younger than I am, he has already endured more hurt and injustice than many face in a lifetime.

While at our house for supper one night, Eduardo calmly told us how his mother had mistreated and physically abused him throughout his entire childhood. For reasons he never understood, she treated his siblings kindly but reserved punishments for him. Many nights he was sent outside to sleep with no blanket, no food, and no explanation.

Stories of heartache like Eduardo’s are not uncommon, but the difference in his story was the ending. With clear eyes and a confident smile, he shared that he had completely forgiven his mother and holds no bitterness toward her. He prays for her daily and even thanks God for her. True to his word, he requests prayer for his mother at almost every service.

The forgiveness Eduardo has shown is both beautiful and powerful. When his mother’s life comes to an end, she will carry many regrets, but Eduardo will not. He chose to forgive even without an apology, when forgiveness seemed undeserved by human standards.

I don’t have Eduardo’s same life experience, but each of us will wrestle with forgiveness in one form or another. Whether it’s someone who has deeply wronged us or simply misunderstood us, forgiveness is a part of every Christian’s journey. Scripture reminds us that we will be wronged and mistreated. In fact, we’re promised that. I Peter 2:21 says,

“For to this you have been called, because Christ also suffered for you, leaving you an example, so that you might follow in his steps.”

When I look at the example Jesus set for us, I’m reminded that forgiveness isn’t optional for the believer, it’s essential. And through His strength, it’s also possible. I wouldn’t call myself an expert in the school of forgiveness, but here are a few lessons I’ve learned along the way. 

Lesson 1: When Someone Hurts You, Don’t Hurt Them Back

The old saying is true: “I’d rather have a hurt heart than a hard heart.” Okay, maybe it’s not that old, perhaps I just saw it on Instagram, but the truth still stands.

We can build walls to protect ourselves, but those same walls can also keep love and healing out. In the end, I would rather risk being hurt than become so guarded that I begin to hurt others. When we are offended or hurt, we have a choice. We can break the cycle by refusing to respond in the same way, and to offer forgiveness instead of retaliation. 

Lesson 2: Reconcile When At All Possible

There are times when setting a biblical boundary is wise and necessary, especially after trauma or abuse. Yet in most relationships, reconciliation really is possible if we are willing to humble ourselves. While trust may take time to rebuild, forgiveness can begin right now.

Jesus taught in Matthew 5:23–24 that reconciliation is even more important than offering gifts at the altar. One of the greatest acts of worship you can give Christ is to take the first step toward mending a broken relationship. 

Lesson 3: Forgiveness Opens the Door to Healing

We often wait to forgive until we “feel ready,” but in truth, healing follows forgiveness, not the other way around. God begins restoring what’s broken the moment we release our grip on anger. Even if a relationship never returns to what it once was, your heart can still be made whole through His grace.

Yes, forgiveness is essential, but it is also urgent. None of us are promised tomorrow. Life moves quickly, and death can close the door on opportunities for reconciliation. Don’t wait until it’s too late to make things right. Reach out, make the call, write the letter, have the conversation. Whatever it takes to obey God’s voice in your life. 

Choose to forgive now, not later, and let God begin the healing work in your heart today.