Can You Trust God Even on Your Hardest Days?

One of the worst days of my life started out as a normal morning. I was getting the kids ready for a homeschool field trip with fellow moms and kids and was running behind. I finally asked my kids if we should even go. Something in me just wanted to stay home, but my oldest insisted that we go so she could see her friends. I had recently had a baby, and it had been a while since she had seen her homeschool friends. 

I packed all the kids up in our van and headed to a cheese factory to meet the other families. When we pulled in, I went to wake up my sleeping three-month-old baby. Immediately, I felt a heavy impression on my heart and felt the Lord say, "No, let her sleep." Our homeschool friends had not yet met her, and I resisted, reaching to grab her out of her car seat, but again I felt that strong impression to let her sleep.

While I really wanted to introduce her to our friends, I knew God must have a reason for this impression, and so, in spite of my desire to show her off, I listened. I went to the back of the van and got her stroller out. Leaving her asleep in her car seat, I gently placed it inside the stroller, making sure not to wake her. 

Walking with the stroller and my other two children, we saw all of the kids and their moms walking towards some corrals. The farmer wanted to show us a newborn calf, and the kids were so excited. 

My young son ran over to join some friends and started climbing on the corral bars to get a better look at the newborn calf. Wanting to let my daughter sleep while staying close to the children and the newborn calf, I parked the stroller beside a little gray box off the cement area and stood on the other side.

The farmer was talking to the children about this newborn calf that had just been birthed the night before. Their eyes were wide with excitement as they hung on every word he said. They were all staring at this cute little fuzzy black-and-white Holstein calf when, all of a sudden, I heard two loud beeps. The farmer yelled, “That means RUN!” 

That very second, I felt like I was caught in a rushing river, with the pressure of two fire hydrants going off at once. I was pushed to the ground, dragged across the cement as chunks of my skin were ripped off my hands, then pinned up against a metal sheet that was added to the corral gate. I immediately knew I was drowning. But it wasn’t water—it was raw sewage from cows and cheese factory waste. The smell was indescribably horrendous.

A Desperate Cry for Help

“Dear Lord, please don’t let me die; give me the strength to save these kids!” I knew I couldn’t breathe, and that if I was drowning in this raw sewage, the kids would be, too.

Immediately after I prayed, God miraculously lifted me up! I was able to stand within this heavily pressurized sewage line that was ejecting as fast and with as much force as two fire hydrants combined. I quickly reached down into the rushing murk and grabbed two children by their arms and pulled with all my might. Up came my oldest daughter and a little girl that my friends had adopted.

I placed them out of harm's way on a side corral bar and told them to hold on with all their strength while I went back to get more kids. With God's strength, I pulled the children up and over to safety, two by two. Afterward, I looked around, and all of the children had been rescued!

I asked the other parents if anyone had seen my son, since I knew he hadn't been among the many kids I had pulled up. One of the parents had seen him running to the top of a hill and said he was throwing up. I immediately went to him, and seeing that he wasn’t covered from head to toe in raw sewage like his sister and me, I asked him how he got out of there.

My son responded that he had prayed for Jesus to help him, and an angel had helped him run through the sewage without falling or being swept away. This was truly a miracle, as the force alone could easily have swept away an adult.

Divine Strength to Keep Going

The aftermath was straight out of a horror movie. I ended up desperately sick and couldn’t keep anything in my body for months, going down to eighty-eight pounds. Anyone looking at me would’ve thought I was near death, and I felt it, too. I had absolutely zero energy. It was hard to walk and hard to move.

I felt like I was barely holding onto life, but I knew I had to keep pressing on to take care of my kids and my baby. My oldest daughter was also extremely sick, and my sweet baby ended up getting severely ill after nursing from me. 

There came a night when I was sleeping, and I felt as if I had awakened, but instead of standing up, I was floating. I saw a beautiful bright light which I knew to be Jesus. As I started going towards Him, I felt so much peace. But then, I cried out, asking that He let me stay to take care of my children. I was about to float over my daughter’s room when I asked Jesus to please let me stay, and it was at that moment I woke up.

 I called my parents and told them about my nighttime experience, and my brother came to help take my oldest daughter and me to the hospital. We were severely dehydrated in addition to everything else that was going on with us. Before that night, I was at the point where I wondered if I would ever get better. Was there ever going to be any relief? After my encounter with Jesus, I knew He would heal me so I could care for my children. And eventually, I did get better, but it was a long road to recovery. 

Continued Grace for Ongoing Suffering

I experienced continued suffering, which reminded me of Paul’s thorn in his flesh. As 2 Corinthians 12:9 says,

“But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is perfected in weakness.” Therefore, I will most gladly boast all the more about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may reside in me.”

I was burdened with a disease from that traumatic experience that I will now carry with me for the rest of my life. Even though I went through these extremely dark days, I’m reminded that God is with me, and He never left my side.

Had He not put it on my daughter’s heart to continue on to that field trip, many children may have perished that day. Had He not told me to let my baby sleep, to leave her in her car seat, she wouldn’t be here today. Even though I carry a disease that I must battle and deal with every day of my life, I can be thankful bearing this burden because I know my life was extended. I was given more time on this earth to take care of my children, and for that, I am grateful! 

No matter how hard our days are, God is with us.